Tears of joy. Tears. Of. Joy. As of yesterday, you can buy The Book at ... wait for it ... Wal-de-Mart. I know. Ptoeey, ptooey, spit. Get over it. The more important point is this. Now, when you are buying Trump's autobiography. Or the latest Duck Dynasty calendar. You can buy The Book. Do you think they will arrange for me to do a book signing with Jessica Simpson ... ??